§ If you take me for everything §

Dearest...

2008-02-28T17:27:00.000-08:00

~~Dear Sansa~~

No, that wasn't right. Lucas scribbled the line out and tried again.

~~Dearest Sansa~~

Still wrong. Why the hell hadn't erasers been invented yet?

~~To Sansa~~

And that sounded like an elementary school valentine. Check yes or no?

Sansa,

I've written started this letter thousands of times on paper, and many more in my head. There's no telling what I'd intended to say any one of those times, and even now I have no idea what I could possibly put in to words to express how I feel about you, and what I've done to you in the short time we've known one another.

How long has it been? Three years now since I met and proposed to you? I remember why I'd done it too. You were like an angel from heaven, you fell from the clouds and straight in to my life. I don't know what I'd have done if you hadn't been there for me all those times, if you hadn't held me up when I could barely stand on my own. You, with your grown up ways and your beautiful eyes, and always having the answer to everything that ever needed to be said or done. You knew everything for the better part of my teenage years, where I knew nothing. I grew up a lot in those three years, I learned things I'd never have known if it hadn't been for that one fateful meeting in the woods. Funny how life works that way.

I've never been able to express to you in person just how much you mean to me, and now I never will. We've parted ways, you and I, and I doubt the two of us will ever cross paths again. No need to worry though, the time we spent together was some of the best in my entire life. You and Ransom made everything right side up again when all was turned around the wrong way, and I want to thank you for that. You saved me, Sansa. You saved me from what could have been an inevitable life of servitude, living for the rest of my days trapped in the past as a stable boy or something worse. Through you I learned courage, common sense, and values, and probably some better morals somewhere along the way.

I can continue telling you how wonderful you've made my life for hours, this could turn in to a book, but eventually it would all become repetitive and tedious. I should have told you more when we were together, and I know it. I took advantage of your smiles and pushed you away without giving you the affection you needed and for that I'm sorry. If I could go back and change it, if I could slap myself three years ago and get my stuff together, knowing what I know now, I'd do everything over, and that time I'd do it right.

We can time travel to so many different places, and yet we can't seem to find ourselves in passing when we do, we never pass by and catch a glimpse of our younger, or even our older selves. Only shadows. It's probably a good thing mind you, paradoxes and the like.

I'm getting off topic.

I guess the point of this letter was lost somewhere along the way. Ransom told me once just to get all of my feelings out on paper, but I couldn't do it at the time. It's not that I thought I was too manly for that kind of thing. Far be it from that I just couldn't think of what to say, I couldn't get any of it out.

I just wanted to tell you that I love you. I've loved you from the moment I saw you and I'll love you until the day the world stops moving, possibly beyond that. I'll never love anyone the same way that I love you. A wise woman once told me that lovers come and go, and that you love each and every one of them differently, but you still love them. I don't think I can, and even so I don't really think that I want to. You were the best thing to ever happen to me and I'm thankful for the time I had.

Now we must part though, and I hope some day you find someone that can do you the justice you deserve. I wish you the longest, and fullest of lives with a husband who dotes on you and children who love you.

Lucas

HAG!

2007-11-14T11:41:00.000-08:00

That lying old hag! She did something to me. She drugged me and did something to me and she's making it look like I was in on it.

I feel sick. I don't know what she did to me, and Sansa won't listen to me, I can't get her to look at me.

I need Ransom. I hate to admit it but I need Ransom.

Somebody help me. Please. I don't know what to do. I can't deal with this. I'm at my wits end.

Comics.

2007-10-12T10:20:00.000-07:00

When I was younger I remember watching Lord of the Rings with Zorak and his mom and dad once.

I remember Gandalf saying to Frodo, 'Keep it secret. Keep it safe.' And now it's funny because I'm taking a fictional character's advice too.

Though, a year ago who'd have thought I'd be living this kind of life.

I don't even know how it happened. I can barely remember anymore. It's like I'm living in a dream and I'm going to wake up.

Parts of it I want to wake up from. Zorak and me, this whole situation... I'd love to wake up from it.

Being adopted? Nah. I liked that feeling. I mean it's not like they officially adopted me, but I felt like I belonged somewhere.

Sansa? No. I'd never want to wake up from that. She's the most amazing person ever. She's.. She's like my whole world. She's strong, and I know I don't give her the credit she deserves but she is. She's smart. She's got class. She's..

Well she's just the most wonderful person in the whole world. And I know I don't deserve her. And I know she puts up a lot from me. I love her and I'd give the world for her if she asked me to, she's been wonderful.

I'm working to become more of the kind of person she deserves.

I feel like I'm a hero living in a comic book. Isn't that so weird? What would they think about me now.

Stalker.

2007-10-02T14:45:00.000-07:00

They're stalking me. Zorak and his screwed up brother are stalking me. They're everywhere I go, they're even in our house. Zolak. That's his name. He's worse than Zorak. I can't stop them if I can't see them, they use that stupid magic, they're always invisible. He was in the HOUSE.

Then again I can never tell which is which.. They laugh differently, I guess that helps.

They don't really seem to bother Sansa. I'm glad for that. But they won't stop torturing me. And Zolak asked about the harp.

I need to find it now. Absolutely need to find it.

Master.

2007-09-29T13:41:00.000-07:00

~~Look at what you've done to me, you've become my enemy. Poisoning the world for me, take away my everything, weakened as I am.~~

I proposed to Sansa. I was a Squire to the Knights of Legend, though I don't know if I am anymore. I backed down, but Minako doesn't seem to want to give up on me. I just don't know if I want to be a part of something like that. I knew they weren't all that they were cracked up to be, but Sir Ransom gave me hope that not all of the Knights were arrogant, pigheaded.. Well, jerks.

I don't know. I need time to think. I'm not ready for these kinds of decisions.

But I proposed to Sansa. That, at this point, is the most important thing that's happened to me. I love her, I trust her, she's my world. I'll do anything for her. I worry about her but I trust her.

I need to talk to someone. I don't have anyone to talk to, but I need someone. I can't go to Lady Minako about this, she won't understand. Sir Ransom isn't around. He's been gone for.. I don't know. But he's been gone. Sansa I'll talk to, I can't keep this a secret from her, but she isn't going to be able to help me. I don't want to do this alone, but I don't want her involved.

I was sad when Zorak died. I had felt like I'd lost a huge piece of my soul, he'll always be my brother, I can't change how I feel, and that isn't going to make what I have to do any easier. Somewhere along the way he came back. I don't know how. I need to find out who, and why. I feel like I'm part of someone's sick, twisted joke. When he came up to me last night I thought I was going to be sick.

And then his mysterious brother that's come out of nowhere. I think it's time I hunt him down and find out what exactly is going on.

I'll kill Zorak. And if I have to I'll kill Zolak, too, should he decide to get in my way. This is going to end.

I need help.

Letters

2007-06-30T10:14:00.000-07:00

I miss Sansa and Zorak, despite all the bad that Zorak has caused since he lost it.

I left to find something to help bring Zor back down to Earth, and now I'm on my way home again because there's no more need to do that.

I'll admit I cried for a little while when I got the charm I gave Zor, and a letter, from a traveling postman.

He died, Zor. Probably his own powers getting the better of him, but all the same he's dead and my only stop before I return home to Sansa and my foster parents is to see his father and tell him the news.

It's only fair. But it hurts so much. He was my brother, and now he's gone.

Sorry Zor, I couldn't save you.

Rumours Ruin

2007-06-10T00:11:00.000-07:00

I...

I heard the most awful...

No.

Zorak wouldn't help anyone kidnap someone's kid. He wouldn't.

I won't believe it. Not Zorak. He's a good person. I know he is. He wouldn't hurt anyone. He wouldn't.

He got weird after he met that woman... That woman from the whore house...

I don't remember what he said her name was. No maybe it was before that. When he got his powers.

Oh please. Zor... Don't have let it gone to your head.

He's lost it.

I've got to do something, or he's going to destroy himself before he even gets close to what he wants to do. He wanted me to help him and I wouldn't do it.

It was hard. He's practically my brother. He is my brother. I feel sick. Part of me feels like I should have just said yes. But the greater, smarter part of me knows that I made the right decision. ~~I hope.~~

I heard a woman talking about a book that had some helpful magic items in it. If I can't beat him with myself alone I'm going to need help from his own field.

I won't let you do this Zor.

Friends.

2007-05-30T11:24:00.000-07:00

I'm worried that Zor might try to do something and end up hurting himself. He has all these weird powers now, and he might try to take advantage of them.

I'm going to keep with him even if he doesn't want me to, he's my best friend, I can't let him get hurt.

Maybe I'll talk to Sansa...

Sansa

2007-05-23T20:05:00.001-07:00

I keep running into this girl, Sansa.

She's like, really nice, and really pretty, and she blushes all the time.

I think she hates me. And today she had to bandage me up because I was all busted after a run in with Zor's dad...

I kind of like her, but I swear she hates me.

Now I should probably go find Zorak... He'll be mad, I think.

Hurt

2007-05-22T15:04:00.000-07:00

It hurts too much to move right now. Gotta avoid Zor though.

He's going to flip.

...Dear...

2007-05-20T10:06:00.000-07:00

Dear Zorak,

I do not have your stupid skateboard.

You probably left it at home, or something, because I know for sure that I do NOT have it.

Why don't I have it?

Because the last time I touched the thing I nearly died, and once again you thought it was funny, just like that time in the tree in your back yard.

Anyways.

I don't have your skateboard. Did you check in your mess of a closet?

Your Friend,

Lucas

..Into the Country..

2007-05-18T15:26:00.001-07:00

Zorak likes to pretend everything is alright, but I know he only smiles to make me feel better.

He can be so cold and bitter, I can understand why in some ways, it's not like things have been tip-top for me, but I wish he'd smile for real for once. Just once. Even if it was just for me.

He was wearing long sleeves again, and it's warm out today. I'm sure he and his dad got into it again. Next time...

Next time I'll step in. I won't stand for that.

He should be a father. Not a monster.